Steer Clear of Self-Sabotage

One of the most important realizations that I constantly struggle to remind myself of is the fact that everything that happens to us in life is a lesson and a blessing.

This can be challenging because there is nothing but the feeling of helplessness when things seem out of control. More difficult than dealing with the actual issue is trying to understand why they happened. This is particularly hard for me to cope with especially here at The Wish Group where the atmosphere is genuinely to help all of our stakeholders excel in their endeavours.

What I have come to realize is that the bigger the dream, or purpose the easier it can become for entrepreneurs to essentially self-sabotage their own success.

Through research and speaking with others on this topic I’ve realized that before being able to make any major progress, there comes a point where we come up against our internal resistance. This physiological response understandably aims to maintain a status quo which makes us feel safe, however it is also what causes us to be stuck, resist growth and thus fall short of meeting our full potential.

There are a few patterns that one can fall into, all of which lead down the path to self-sabotage. One of these is taking the results of your efforts personally. If you tried a certain strategy and it didn’t work out its vital not to decide that you are a failure and give up the attempt to try again. Outcomes are just outcomes and they will change with new action. Don’t decide that an outcome you produced is the result of you being a bad or unworthy person. Instead take this as an opportunity to learn and correct going forward.

Conversely, if you decide that you are better than others because of a good outcome that you created, then you put yourself on the path of destruction because you are feeding a false sense of your ego and you will be humbled by life. I see this with sales professionals all the time, especially when I contrast people starting out in their careers who give up when a certain strategy doesn’t work and those that are veterans who feel they are better than others and then start to stumble as a result.

Another common pattern is micro managing your teams in efforts to try and control all outcomes. This of course is another reaction to trying and staying safe. The problem with trying to do this is that other, more critical aspects of the business that require your actual input and efforts are left by the wayside. There is only so much time in a day and focusing your time on growing, enriching and nurturing your business, clients, products or services will ensure a much lower level of self-sabotage overall.

A third common form of self-sabotage is over promising and under delivering. As a small business, you may find yourself stretching resources to try and take on any and all forms of business that knocks on the door or answers your calling however, in essence what you’re going to end up doing is failing along the way and inevitably sabotage the business that you’ve worked so hard to build. I always suggest that businesses have a strong plan in place, the team behind the plan to ensure execution and then work to provide quality over quantity. As you move to the next phase of your business plan, quantity will come and by then you’ll have the experience in place to handle it.

Keep in mind to try and not take outcomes personally, whether good or bad, but rather see everything that happens as a lesson and a blessing for your growth and benefit. Remember, you are not what happens to you, or the outcomes that you create. You are experiencing life to learn lessons, grow and become more by giving back and improving the lives of others.
Have a great week.

Frank.